Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
