your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
