At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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