You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
