no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
You are a genius and a whore.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
