it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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