Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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