That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Randomize
