i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
