Ambien. No doubt about it.
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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