her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
