toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Randomize
