She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
