Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Randomize
