Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
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