what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize