I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
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