NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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