bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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