who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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