I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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