U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
