The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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