Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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