I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
