your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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