i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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