Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
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