i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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