take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I am available for nakedness
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
