Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize