I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
