your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
