The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize