I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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