Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
only you would photoshop your dick
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Randomize