so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
im six kinds of drunk right now
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
