i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
