I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
