I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
