Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
