My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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