'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
