I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
