Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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