She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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