i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
