Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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