We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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