Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize