Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
two words...techno handjob
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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